Christmas Special

Welcome to the Official 2011 Christmas Blog from Le Bat Cave.

Generally we are pretty generous, but because this is Christmas we are going to be super generous and give you all the best christmas present ever, an Exclusive!!

Exclusive!!!! Jurassic Park 4

It's been a number of years since the last installment of this franchise, and because the Hollywood Brains Trust has turned its attention to not coming up with original concepts, we are travelling back in time a gazillion years to when dinosaurs ruled the earth, with their tyranny and dirtbag attitudes. So whats the exclusive? Well we have the actual plot of the movie that Steve Spielberg has come up with.

Plot: The fourth movie takes place 125 years after the last movie. (For those of you who can't remember, the third movie (an absolute classic.....) took place on a different island, a party island. The humans decided they'd try and make dinosaurs party, the dinosaurs partied alright, by eating all the humans and then drinking all the wine.) Having realized that bringing dinosaurs back to life using mosquito jizz was probably as about as smart as trying to drown fish in water, the humans have come up with an even better idea!!! Dinosaurs in space. In the 125 years since the last film, a young college student has trained his pet Triceratops to fly a spaceship with his gang of misfit mates. His mates are a T-Rex, a little green thing that ate that dickhead from the Second Movie, and 4 Velociraptors who have now learnt to communicate through texting and facebook rather than making those ridiculous sounds.

From here they fly about the solar system looking for trouble, and by god they find it, in the form of an exotic alien race hell bent on Universal Domination. They have big space ships and they have big laser guns. Cue gun fights, drama, comedy and just realistic terror.

We don't want to spoil the movie for everyone, but its pretty obvious that the dinosaurs win and turn the aliens into their personal slaves. The dinosaurs then go home and eat all the humans for sending them into battle with the aliens. Spielberg will fill in all the logistics and technical jargon with his usual cutting edge script writing and plotting.

This movie will be a cross between Star Wars and The original Jurassic Park, and we are guessing it will be the fourth highest grossing films of all time. Don't tell anyone that we told you this as it's a massive hollywood secret

Now, because we are all about the internet and what information that it holds, heres some things we have recently found:
I'm Santa and I Know It
Bad Lip Reading
Drunk Kitchen

Alright we are more hungover than usual and this is a God forsaken Ordeal!!!! So Have a Merry Christmas, if that's what your into, if you're not, get a life. And we might see you before the New Year, just to cap off the year where this blog was created and turned the world on its head......Or just did nothing