Have you ever considered how you would operate in a world where you were the lead role in an actual film, tv show or book? How would you deal with the outlandish situations that arise from a writers 7 day coke bender? Well us here at the Batcave will share our opinions on who we would take the place of in a variety of situations, or how we would act in any number of situations. The following list does not enlist the stylings of pornography to compare to, but if we had to, our names would be Rock Hardwood and Bronx.
Lord of the Rings
Who: An Elf
Why: I think its fair to say that the Elves would get all the trim. Elven Sweet Marys are mega hot, plus graceful, and they can do awesome things with a bow staff. Mind you the competition isn't exactly a close second, its a distant second. The only other one with half a shot would be wizards, cos they know magic, and chicks love magic, but their beards give that oh so gay pedo look. and the other choices are hobbits, which are just hairy midgets, Dwarves which are just hairy midgets, those things that come out of the ground and are all covered in mud and paint and a walking, talking tree. So yes, in conclusion, we would be super cool Elves. Also, Elves get to bang Miranda Kerr
Thor
Who: Thor
Why: Why would we want to be anyone else? He's muscly, he pulls sweet babes, and he has a hammer. Plus he gets sweet babes. His competition is Loki, the God of mischief, not the God of being a Handsome Mother F, and his dad, who already has a missus. We want to keep our options open and not be straight up into marriage town.
Pokemon
This isn't want we would be, this is what one we would own. Obviously.
Who: Pikachu
Why: Basically, its the only one we could remember. It produces electricity, which would be heaps efficient. But in the end, if we were walking down the street and these little gimps were all up in our grill about wanting to do some battles, we would deffo have the upper hand over most things. Except for that dragon thing, it looks pretty mean. Plus it would get the sweet babes cos its as cute as a button.
City Slickers
Who: No-One
Marshy: Billy Crystal
Why: Marshy is a dead set city slicker who is all about the Gucci handbags and the D&G Sunnies. Even though he is a top bloke and does like to go on treasure hunts when old people die, we would not be in this movie with him because all the other characters are total noobs. The guy who was a bad guy in Home Alone is ok, but he ain't getting no sweet marys, and lets face it, Crystal is hilarious and would be gathering more clunge than he would know what to do with.
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