Hello friendos,
Monday.......Voted worst day of the week EVER by everyone with a job since the early Egyptians started building the Pyramids. Granted that the people who constructed the pyramids were in fact slaves, it should be still noted that they hated Mondays the most. Anyway after that rant, its time to delve into the deep murky waters of things we've witnessed outside of the walls of the Batcave. And let me tell you, we see some things. Honestly we see more than we remember. But anyway, here we go
Extreme Gardening
When anyone thinks about the wonderful world of gardening, inevitably the Green Thumb that you think of is Don Burke, the bearded Garden Nazi with a love of lemon trees and all things grass. You wouldn't really think of an elderly Asian man with a Bike helmet and safety glasses literally attacking some kind of fern with a rake would you? It ended up a fern massacre.
Public Displays of......Spewing (If you don't like spew, skip this section)
I think its reasonable to assume, that at one point or another, anyone who has put alcohol into their faceholes (mouth) has either had a "Sneaky Bulimic" spew or a "Was that an Exorcism?" Spew. What you don't really expect that either of these occur before the sun goes down. Well my friends they missed that memo in Stathfield. Whilst on a trip to the bathroom at the train station, the cubicle was locked, so I thought nothing of it. There was a bit of coughing, but as a general follower of medicine I assumed that the change of seasons may have led this poor customer into obtaining some kind of flu strain. What came next was the vomit session of a lifetime. Not being able to actually see (Thank the Lord), the noise of what sounded like a poltergeist trying to escape from a human being, more than made up for it. Also the spew flying out from underneath the door onto my shoe. I'm gonna go all CSI now and state that he was in fact, a meth addict, or a possessed hobgoblin.
Tuckermax.com
Now, Tucker Max has been around for years, as both a person and a person with a blog. He basically tells stories. Stories which have a plot based in and around truth. We find him quite funny. But we here at the Batcave have started learning the ways of the lady folk and have come to the conclusion that if you act like Tucker Max, even though you may find it funny, it probably isn't and you are just being rude. Case in point, we decided to test out his theories of picking up women, by being forward and obnoxious. The story goes:
Batcaver: Do you speak French?
Hot Girl: No
Batcaver: Tu es l'air beau
Hot Girl: What does that mean?
Batcaver: You look beautiful
Hot Girl: Oh thanks very much!
Batcaver: Oh.....no....I was just using my french
*Hot Girl stops talking to Batcaver
Lesson learned?
- Know more French
- Don't try and be someone you're not (Tucker Max)
Ok, well thats the final blog for Season One. Luckily, season Two will most likely start next week. we don't follow the rules of the silver screen and have a season once a year. Also we have 12 episodes per season. We are just that great.
Laterz
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